The Bottom Line, Ministries Christian News, Articles, & Poetry 
Fighting With Yourself
By Joel B.
Have you ever had a conflict with someone that you felt was necessary, but in the end you just end up feeling guilty about it? Have you ever been called to do something by the Lord and feel like obstacles keep falling in your way? These types of situations are common and have been faced by many people in the Bible. Let’s look at some examples:
Jonah 4:8 And it came to pass, when the sun did arise, that God prepared a vehement east wind; and the sun beat upon the head of Jonah, that he fainted, and wished in himself to die, and said, It is better for me to die than to live.
In this first example we have Jonah ready to give up on life because God allowed the sun to beat down on his bald head. Jonah was also upset that God would not destroy Nineveh. Unfortunately, Jonah allowed himself to be overwhelmed by a task that was clearly laid out by God. In the end, Jonah was only fighting with himself.
Exodus 3:11 And Moses said unto God, Who am I, that I should go unto Pharaoh, and that I should bring forth the children of Israel out of Egypt?
In this next example, Moses was given an audience with the very Creator of the universe and still he questioned his own adequacy to complete the task given to him. We need to remember that if God’s Hand is on something, it cannot fail. During this encounter with God, Moses was only fighting with himself.
2 Samuel 12:5-6 And David’s anger was greatly kindled against the man; and he said to Nathan, As the LORD liveth, the man that hath done this thing shall surely die: And he shall restore the lamb fourfold, because he did this thing, and because he had no pity (David was the man).
Remember when David had Uriah the Hittite set up so he would be killed, then Nathan told David about the man who had his one ewe stolen by the man who had many? Well, David immediately passed judgment on himself. He took what wasn’t his and ended up fighting with himself.
Friends, there are many examples of men fighting with themselves in the Bible. We need to be extra careful and learn from their mistakes or we can fall into the same pit. Don’t put yourself in bad situations where you’ll end up feeling inadequate or guilty about something. God wants you to live in victory! So, try not to get into conflicts with other people and definitely avoid conflicts with God. Doing so will keep you from fighting with yourself. Thank you for reading and God bless.
Thanks for writing this Joel. It speaks close to my own heart. The first two questions you ask in the opening paragraph really apply.
I am a person who often feels it necessary to challenge people on things, start conflicts over things that are really not that important. But for some reason, at the time, they DO seem important to me. And I find it hard to fight that urge.
I have also felt a calling since we met, and felt like obstacles continue to get in my way. This is also disheartening, and causes me to fall back on those bad ways of mine. Going from a 0 to 10 on the manic scale in an instant. Over-reacting. Not being sure how to (or even if I can) cope.
And always, later, I feel guilty and wrong, and ashamed of myself.
I’ve had this problem my entire life. Quite literally, I would cause these kinds of problems with friends even in early grade school.
I have tried many times to identify the triggers, and identify when the feeling is coming over me, and fight it. To try to remain calm. To try to not over-react. As I know later I will regret it. Even as I tell myself that I know I will regret it, I still find myself very compelled to press the issue.
I will pray for strength to help me finally learn to deal with and overcome this problem in my life. I’ve failed to do so in every conventional manner. I’m sure you are correct that the answer is to find a stronger spiritual foundation and find strength through Jesus.