“Dear Mom, I’m hurting…”

Dear Mom,

I don’t know what to say to you anymore.  You don’t talk to me.  You don’t listen and you are never home, so I thought I would take one last chance and write to you the old fashioned way.

I don’t understand you anymore.  I thought we were friends but lately all you seem to care about is what your own friends are doing on Facebook or Twitter.   Plus, I don’t understand why you keep hanging out with them especially the new guy.  He gives me the creeps.  Whenever your friends are here, he stares at me when you are not looking.  I swear he’s going to hurt me one of these times.  I just don’t understand why you need to hang out with him so much.  He has loser written all over him. Besides, I miss hanging out with just the two of us.

I understand that you work so much so I can have a place to stay and  food on the table or for me to have all of the stuff I do, but I hardly ever see you.  When I was a kid, you use to tuck me in and read me a story at night.  We even said prayers sometimes.  Now I just tuck myself in and read my texts or Tweets.

I remember how you use to cook us real food to eat.  You were such a good cook.  I wasn’t picky then as long as you made it.  And do you remember when I found a bird who broke it’s wing?  We took it in and nursed it back to health so his wing could heal.  We would laugh so hard at that bird because you would tuck his head under his wing and rock him a couple of times and he would fall asleep instantly.  I will never forget how the neighbor kept pounding on our door insisting we had a pet that wasn’t allowed.  It was our little secret. Remember how much I cried when we had to let him go?  You told me that he needed to be free and spread his wings.

Is that what you are trying to do now?  I hear you at night sometimes crying and I feel like I have done something wrong.  Did I do something to make you mad?  Are you upset because I want to spend time at Dad’s for the summer?  I’m sorry if it makes you disappointed in me, but I haven’t seen him since Thanksgiving, and I know he actually wants to spend time with me.  He texted me last week and told me how much he misses me. He said he is excited about my visit.  I know you think he is just lying and will break my heart again because he will change his mind, but I have to try.  After all, he is my Dad.

Well, I guess that’s it for now.  I’m sorry if I upset you or if you are mad at me.  Sometimes I feel like I can never do anything right in your eyes and I often wonder if I am even good enough.  I wish you would ask me how I’m doing.  How school’s going.  In case you wondered, my grades are okay and my friends, well some days I don’t have many.  Actually, I don’t really have any.

I feel so alone and lost, but don’t worry, I’ll be fine.  I know you are busy trying to keep up with everything and that you just don’t have enough time to get things done.  I’m sorry that I’m a burden for you since you can’t really live the life that you wanted although some days I feel like that’s what you are trying to do.

I often wonder if maybe you would be better off if I just moved to Dad’s that way you can live the single life you always wanted.  You wouldn’t have to worry about taking care of me.  Maybe that’s what I will suggest to Dad and see what he says.  It would be an adventure that’s for sure.  Well, I have to get to practice.  I just hope you are able to find time to read this soon.  I miss you. I love you.

Your Teenager